There is this phrase: Every generation needs those who do not live as if their lives had a beginning and an end, but who live with the knowledge that the end is followed by a new beginning. I believe that I have unconsciously, but with time more and more clearly, and finally as a conscious decision, made this attitude my profession, the basis of my path. Throughout time there has always been this form of profession, of vocation; nomads, wandering monks, rangers, all until European modernity constricted the space through urbanization, industrialization and state administration. But the nomadic part was and is always there, it is part of our cultural heritage and subconscious mind, rooted in 280,000 years of nomadic clan life. In our time, when culture has become so reified and molded into material values, the profession that radically underlies the ideal culture of change and self-renewal has returned in the form of the professional revolutionary. And even if I cannot claim to embody this high ideal, it serves as a support for thought, as a model for a path that many beautiful people, greater people have walked before us, becoming symbols of renewal, awakening, the search for a free life and resistance and struggle against the wrong, the betrayal of humanity. For me it connects all the artisans who were valuable to me, but cannot be imagined separately from one another: Writers who tell us about the right way, about the worlds that are possible; journalists who search for and write only the truth; historians who connect history with life and our time and point to the future; psychologists who dissolve the blockages of the mind; musicians who from nothingness and silence can create harmony and beauty. Putting all these things on a proper footing and filling them with meaning has taken me all the way to Mesopotamia and made me realize that if this path and profession is to be sustainable and not just an individualistic art of living, it must be practiced in a broad collective and organized way. I have become part of this great movement here, on the one hand to be able to learn more deeply, to understand how we can live and advance this change first in ourselves, and on the other hand aware that the center of the struggle of our time, the contemporary attempt to make a free society and democratic socialism possible, is the Middle East, Kurdistan. Even though my goal is still to bring this clarity, the consciousness and the power that emanates from here back to Europe, it is not yet clear when the right time will come and what tasks still lie ahead on this long road. It is one of the great and beautiful missions to spread the philosophy and spirit of a new internationalism from here, to bring it to Europe and beyond. The path to here was only a beginning, because the tasks of the time need a good foundation. I will go to another tree nursery this summer, two hills to the east, in the free mountains. If until now I have learned at an elementary school level, this will be more of a university setting; I will deepen the connections among wise friends, continue to search for truths. Until autumn, this will be my mission. What happens after that is open, we shall be curious and alert. There are many ideas, plans, and when we have a good understanding of the background and conditions of the path, we will be able to make a right decision and something good will come out of it. Whatever comes out in the end – it will be great.

Of all the seasons, I have always liked autumn the most: For me it represents a time of gaining clarity, when everything ends and leads to a clear, deep meaning and in the storm one's own power becomes tangible. A time of change, an awakening after the lightness of summer. I think decisions and connections that arise in autumn have always had a greater depth for me, because they arise in the face of danger, the impending cold snap and in the awareness of the need for alliances. Perhaps the feeling of my youth was one of endless autumn, and perhaps that describes the climate of our society – in mute anticipation of the cold, and in hope for a spring of which no one yet knows when it will come or how it will be brought about. I have been in a new place for two weeks, about which it is said that it is always cold, which is even sung about, but for me it is the best climate, as a child of the North; the only thing I miss are forests. In this respect, this year I have not been lucky, because even during the summer I have been in dangerous heights where no tree lasts. During the summer I studied mostly, and you might laugh a little when you hear what my friends have come up with for me – right now I'm waiting for my violin so I can begin my work. How long I will stay with it and as for future paths, everything is still open, and we will see what storm the spring will bring. I feel that I am at the beginning of a new stage, a time of work, of creation, which follows a long path, dedicated above all to learning and gaining clarity. This path was very long, seven years, the end of which was the last year and a half in this strange part of the world, of which there are no maps (and if there are, they cannot show in any way what the true meaning of these areas is). I have spent the last time thinking about the question of the right style and method; of course, this reflects the question of right leadership – both self-leadership and the question of initiative in collective and social terms. For my weakness was in precisely this respect: not being able to properly express, embody and live what I recognized in thought as right, true and beautiful. From the detachment of thinking these many  mistakes developed, idealistic approaches, wrong attitude, negativity and rage (basically these rages, which are actually panic attacks, represent the patriarchal fear, which in a small way bring out the nihilistic gesture of fascist aggression, mental microfascism, helpless outcry against the apparent hopelessness of the situation and mirror of the violence of the world, which is always directed against the wrong ones); above all, I believe that, contrary to the appearance of rushing forward, I am learning and changing terribly slowly as far as real understanding is concerned.

From now on, the way back begins for me, the attempt to come home. Of course, not the old home that no longer exists; but the path of creating a world worth living in. Our home is the land of the children of the future, as some friends put it, and the way to get there is through understanding and uniting our past with our deep desire and reality. My path in this part of the world and all the decisions were directed to find a solution to the dilemma of our youth and societies. Perhaps also because I am a good deal more conservative than I would have admitted to myself before, I feel that my path draws me to Europe, and that the part that falls to me takes place mainly there. This is probably also connected with the fact that I gained only recently a feeling for a kind of homeland and for the society which I come from, and therefore the longing for living connections consciously is strong and fresh. I want to live out a laughing revenge against the long period of prevented love and blocked desire that does not destroy but forces all that is wrong to change and recognize the truth. The discussions we are having here give hope for good things, and even if it is not yet clear when and how everything will develop, I believe that all of this is quite excellent and something great will come out of it. I trust that you will move forward and that your energy will grow steadily.